Every time I think of the black market, I actually imagine a market, with little stalls selling illegal things like nuclear weapons and organs.
I THOUGHT I WAS ALONE
WAIT SO THAT’S NOT WHAT IT IS
"QUICK THE COPS ARE COMING!" *everyone frantically tries to collapse their trestle tables*
Two months into our relationship you once asked me how much I loved you and I just said “From here”. You didn’t get it and you got mad and thought I was playing around.
Breaking up after almost two years together, I sent you a message 6 months later saying “To Here”.
You still didn’t get it.
And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”
And Abraham replied, “What.”
God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.
And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”
To which they responded, “Gay.”
And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.
see you all in hell
You know all those wonderful Conservative parents who proceed to abandon, kick out, or cut off their children for any reason (including, but not limited to a child’s sexuality)?
Well here we go:
“But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”
1 Timothy 5:8 (NKJV)
i’ve always seen ridiculous stuff on here like when people were studying books in class and the teacher asked why the curtains were blue or something and i thought it was made up but today in english we were watching a movie and my teacher asked what the significance of the mop leaning against the wall was